A Beautiful Lesson In Life and Adversity

A carrot, an egg, and a cup of coffee. You will never look at a cup of coffee the same way again.

A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up, She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed as one problem was solved, a new one arose.

Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to boil. In the first she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil; without saying a word...
In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl. Turning to her daughter, she asked, ' Tell me what you see.'

'Carrots, eggs, and coffee,' she replied.

Her mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. The mother then asked the daughter to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard boiled egg.

Finally, the mother asked the daughter to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma. The daughter then asked, 'What does it mean, mother?'

Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity: boiling water. Each reacted differently. The carrot went in strong, hard, and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak. The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior, but after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened. The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water.

'Which are you?' she asked her daughter. 'When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?

Think of this: Which am I? Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength?

Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat? Did I have a fluid spirit, but after a death, a breakup, a financial hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and hardened heart?

Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water, the very circumstance that brings the pain. When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavor..

If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you. When the hour is the darkest and trials are their greatest do you elevate yourself to another level? How do you handle adversity? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?

If you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human and enough hope to make you happy. The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way. The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; you can't go forward in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches.

When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling. Live your life so at the end, you're the one who is smiling and everyone around you is crying.

Brighten someone's life today on purpose.

May we all be COFFEE!!!!!!

To your unstoppable success...

Take Time to Play

With the New Year, every one is busy setting goals, focusing on making some major things happen this year and motivated to work hard. These are all key elements to success, but one element so often overlooked is the Time to Play.

As children, we looked forward to our friends knocking at the door asking if we could "come out and play". It was a huge element to our growth and development. But as adults, we tend to see play as a time wasting activity. Sometimes, we confuse competition with playing. Golf for example is a great sport and personally something I have spent a great deal of time doing. But even golf can sometimes simply be a Business Endeavor, with the component of networking and business activities thrown into the game.

The world in general frequently sends the message that playing is a frivolous activity, good only for under-achievers, procrastinators and slackers. But the message is inaccurate. Playing is a necessary activity in order for us to experience the results of our hard work or to motivate us to work hard and enjoy our lives. Playing allows us to release the stress and anxiety our lives create.

Think about the last time you took a weekend trip to the beach or mountains, without your laptop or without turning on your cellphone. When was the last time you went dancing and really cut yourself loose and had a blast? When was the last time you laughed so hard you could barely talk afterwards? Do you remember how you felt? Do you remember how free you were afterwards?

Without play, adults can loose perspective. Your life can not be only about the work and accomplishing your goals. Part of the success you experience will come from the energy you generate from playing. Without play as a balanced element in your life, you will not walk in the world with positive energy. Your work will be harder, your results will less rewarding and your health will be greatly affected.

Playing changes your outlook on life. When you play, you reward yourself for the efforts you are making to accomplish your goals, rejuvenate yourself and feel more anticipation for what you are working toward.

After all, why are you working so hard to be successful? It is so you can live your life on your terms, enjoy your life and have the time with your family they so much deserve. Spending time with your family is all about play time. Your children and your partner deserve to have your play time as well. You can not build relationships without a little play time.

Relationships with your children are built on the playtime. Your children will remember the time you played with them. As for your partner, how can you possibly build a strong intimate relationship without the time to attend to the playful side of your relationship?

Take time today and every day, to put a little play in your life. Reward yourself and re-energize your life with some simple and life changing play time.

To your unstoppable success...

Transforming Dreams into Reality

Everyone dreams, we all have ideas, visions, yearnings, desires and yes, even fantasies we think about and wish would become reality. This is the course of human nature, but not all of these dreams could ever become reality, simply because of the number of dreams we create in our minds along with the fact many of our dreams would not make a real difference in our lives.

However, many of these dreams hold a deep and constant reoccurring place in our minds and our hearts. These are the dreams we can easily turn into actual goals if we are willing to commit the effort. They are the dreams we are passionate about. The dreams we deeply and completely want to have in our lives. These are the dreams we can change into goals and therefore into reality.

But what is the difference in a dream and a real goal?

To quote Diana Robinson; "A dream is a goal without legs".

A dream can be a wonderful thing, but unless you add passion, commitment and belief, it has nowhere to go. In order for a dream to become a true goal, you must add some real fuel to it.

So, how do you take those deeply placed dreams and change them into a true goal and then allow them to become reality?

First of all, decide what you truly want. Take a very hard look at your dreams and determine which ones will make a real difference in your life. Evaluate them and write down the ones you really want. It does not matter how much the dream will change your life, only the level of passion you have to accomplish it.

Now that you know which ones are important to you, take time with one and add clarity to the formula. "If you can see it, you can have it". Get crystal clear on what the goal is. For example; if you want a different job, your goal can not be just a different job, that may be a job you hate. Know what job you want. Know without any doubt what it will feel like to have your dream job. See yourself in the job and if anyone ever asks you what your dream job is, you will have a very clear and precise picture to paint for them. The more clear your vision, the greater your fuel. The easier it is for you to paint the picture of your goal, the faster it will become reality.

Now get very excited. The passion you feed into any goal will be the driving force behind it. The passion will determine how much belief you have in your goal and the belief you have will fuel the end result. Spending some time every day with your vision and the passion you feel about it, will take you anywhere you choose to be.

It is very important to have a belief and commitment to the goal itself. Make it a priority in your life, your mind and your thought process. But here is something very important. When you think about this goal, you should ONLY think about it as a reality. If you see it as something you WANT, you will always just want it. See it as something you HAVE and you will have it.

Hold the thought of HAVING in your mind. Spend some time with your vision and your clarity as though it if it were reality. Only when you have mastered the ability to HAVE before you actually do, will you be able to take the appropriate action.

Unfortunately, most people leave these key points out of their plans. They charge into making something happen but the clarity and the passion are missing. Everything in goals begins with the clarity, the vision, the passion and the ability to experience it in your mind.

You CAN have anything you desire in life, but only when you are willing to change the way you see it.

To your unstoppable success...

The Courage to Succeed in 2010

Here we are starting a New Year. Everyone seems to be setting resolutions and hoping for a better year than 2009. Unfortunately, they are setting the same resolutions as last year (and years before) and the chances of them being anything more than a fleeting memory by January 15 are very slim.

Here is a newsflash for you, New Years resolutions rarely work and rarely make any difference in your life at all. A resolution is only an attempt to achieve something different than you currently have. It is a temporary agreement with yourself. Resolutions rarely include any thought, decision, action or commitment to take you to your goals. What they are not, is decisions.


Why is it, that so many people fail to achieve any goals they set for themselves? Shortly after making a resolution, they can hardly tell you what the resolution was. Could it be they are confused and don't know what to do to move forward? Or, could it be they simply are not sure what they want? Or maybe, they are afraid they will actually achieve a goal or maybe even they realize to achieve it might require some work. Regardless, resolutions do not work.

In order to experience new levels of achievement, you must be able to understand the possibilities of experiencing something new in your life. You must be able to see yourself having attained the goal. Only when you can actually see yourself where you want to be, can you begin to understand the possibility of getting there.

"It takes someone with a vision of the possibilities to attain new levels of experience. Someone with the courage to live his dreams." - Les Brown

Truly a remarkable and insightful quote. Les Brown has in two simple sentences "nailed" the primary reasons most people do not stick with New Years Resolutions and fail to make major changes in their Business and Personal lives.

The achievement of a goal is not a material thing you can simply acquire, not something someone else will bestow on you and it is definitely not magical. It is your own vision of what you want, it is making a decision to achieve a goal. The only way to achieve anything in life is by making a decision to do so.

Understand the difference here. When you make a decision, which means removing all other options from the table, you are then ready to make the commitment, take the action and achieve the goal. This level of decision is based on your own recognition of the possibilities in your life.

In order to have any level of success at anything, you must first of all KNOW exactly where you are going. You must have a clear and definite VISION of what your success will look like. This Knowing creates an energy to take you to your goals.

The other component is the courage to live your dreams. Having something you do not currently have, regardless of what it is... money freedom, time freedom, sports, relationships or anything else which might get us excited, requires immense courage.

What you want can easily be yours, but you must have the courage to step out of your box and claim it. "To have something you have never had, you must do something you have never done". Choose to have vision and courage in every area of your life.

Make the decision today to make the changes you desperately desire. Make the plans, take the action, believe in your own abilities and have the courage to make it happen.

Only then, will 2010 be an awesome year for you.

To Your Unstoppable Success...

Are you Living Your Life With a Clear Purpose?

Washington Irving said; "Great minds have purposes; others have wishes."


Each of us have tremendous potential residing within us. Some find the potential and nurture it, others find it but let it go, others never find it and still others never even look for it.


But regardless of who we are, what our circumstances are or the life we have lived, the potential is there for us all. I believe the underlying difference in the manifestation of huge successes and the lack of success, is that some people attach purpose to their potential and create amazing results while others live life haphazardly, never finding a purpose for their intentions.


When you live life with a purpose, you are adding rocket fuel to every goal, every intention and and every desire you can imagine. Your life becomes focused and on track. Your thoughts, your actions, beliefs, decisions all reflect the purpose you have attached to your life.

But some people never establish their purpose. They can not "find" anything to get them hugely excited and something to give them the motivation to succeed.

Too often, I am reminded how hard it is for some people to find their purpose. They believe it should be something grand and world serving. But a true purpose is something designed to simply leave the world in a better place than it would have been without you.

For example, I will share my true purpose with you

"To demonstrate to everyone I encounter the Best Possible Version of Me". Now that may seem very convoluted and vague, but I feel it is very powerful. There was a time when I wanted to save the world and help thousands of people to change their lives. This is still a very important goal of mine. But by demonstrating the Best Possible Version of Me to the World, to everyone I encounter, I am being a leader who can make a difference.

It puts ME in a position to lead by example. How can I possibly help people if I can not demonstrate the possibilities in and through my own example?

Purpose simply puts your train of life on a solid track. It gives you something to work toward, something you will accomplish through who you are and who you are being. It is not necessary to have a grand and elaborate purpose, especially if you can not see yourself actually in the vision of the purpose itself.

So seek a purpose for yourself that YOU can grow with. Something in life to drive you and motivate you, something you can very excited about. Once you can bring purpose into your everyday life, your goals, your actions and decisions, your life will suddenly change.

The rocket fuel of purpose can take you anywhere you choose to go in life.

To your unstoppable success...

Are Your Thoughts Holding You Back?

It is a known belief in the Personal Development arena the words we speak can affect our results exponentially. With this in mind, we knowingly make a concerted effort to speak words of success and abundance in order to attract these things into our lives.


But, here is another consideration for you and one which has the potential to dramatically effect your results immediately. We all have those little instantaneous thoughts which can make us feel less than successful or empowered. Sometimes, those little thoughts can actually create destructive results for us, simply from the words of destruction we conjure up in our minds, or maybe the lack of commitment to ourselves and our goals.

Those little instantaneous thoughts should be considered as words of destruction. This is an overwhelming concept, so please stay with me on this. I promise you will find it extremely powerful.


Thoughts and words all come from emotion, but there are times when emotion controls not only our words but our thoughts and bring about some very negative results for us. When you are confronted with anything in your life you do not agree with, something resulting in a feeling of frustration or anger, or anything which might make you feel less than the person you choose to be, you are in danger of bringing negative results into your life. Those little fleeting thoughts of doubt, worry, concern or aggravation are controlled by negative emotion. And, negative emotion is more damaging to you than any words you knowingly speak.

Stop and think about it for a moment. Have you ever played out a scenario of how you are going to handle a situation in your mind? Have you ever imagined "getting even" with someone who has hurt you, or have you ever daydreamed of revenge? These things do not just go away. They take up residency in your mind. In contrast, the words you speak are often said only once or twice, while the revengeful, negative and powerful thoughts we attach to scenarios hang on for an extended time.

Thoughts are emotions and emotions are what determine your energy and your vibration. If your thoughts are consumed with negative energy, then what you are "putting out" to the world is negative energy and therefore your results will be negative.

Any level of negative emotion will only hurt you and your results. This emotion will frequently consume us for days and holding on to it will alter your outcome and your results dramatically. In order to manifest positive results into your life, you must eliminate the negative emotion.

You must let go of and eliminate any negative energy you are giving out to the world. Just let it go. When negative emotions start to show their ugly heads, just eliminate them immediately with positive emotion. Yes, it can be done and when practiced becomes quite easy. Make a point to attract only the things you want into your life. Make all of your thoughts intentional. When your thoughts are controlled, then the words are controlled and the end result is the accomplishment of some major positive results in your life.

To your unstoppable success...

Step Forward In Faith to Claim Yourself

So much of our society lives in a non-empowering state of mind. We accept failure as the normal, in fact, expect failure in most of what we do. We have learned from the multitudes how only a select few are lucky enough to "Have It All".

There was a time when I was one of the multitudes. I believed my success depended on the actions of others and the luck of the draw. But early in my adult life I found this to be a myth. Very early in my career in the Airline Industry, I found I could get the promotions and the special projects simply by stepping up to the plate, taking action and voicing my own self belief. This belief and change in my behaviors allowed me to travel the world and make my mark in the industry.

Great successes in life never just happen. They are always a result of action. But too often, fear and doubt keep us from taking massive action for our own successes. It takes tremendous intestinal fortitude to step out of your box and claim your life. Fear (false evidence appearing real) can totally control your life only if you choose to let it.

Fear is the exact opposite of faith but yet they are the same thing. Both are believing in something you can not see. Personally, I choose faith in making my choices and it has proven to be an exceptional direction in my life. Faith is hope, expectation, empowerment and courage.

You must choose faith over fear if you choose to create the life of your dreams. People who criticize or frown on postitive action are not the people you want in your life anyway. You are the people you associate with, so choose not to associate with anyone who does not support your dreams and your actions.

If you want something powerful in your life, you must surround yourself with the people who are getting the same results. Wouldn't it be much better to look forward knowing, expecting life to give you exactly what you want, instead of fearing failure?

We all deserve to have exactly what our hearts desire most. The only way to have those things is to not worry about what other people think, be responsible for yourself and take action to make fabulous things happen in your life.

On this special day, Christmas Day 2009, I am very moved to give my readers something empowering. Something of myself to hopefully give you a push to make your life not just ordinary, but extraordinary.

The best thing I can give you is hope. Life can be fun, facinating, spontaneous, joyful and fulfilling but YOU have to want it and YOU have to be willing to have it. It always amazes me when someone tells me exactly what they want but are not willing to have it. When you focus on your goals, give them attention, faith and expectation, coupling that with a "no fear" attitude, ANYTHING is possible.

Step out of your world, your box of less than extraordinary and get what you want most in life. We all deserve to live extraordinarily. It can be yours, but YOU must not fear, you MUST believe and you MUST take action.

To your unstoppable success...

Tap Into Your Own Unlimited Potential

Every human is born with unlimited potential. It is a God given gift we each possess. Our accomplishments, integrity, level of success, relationships, how we live, the depth of our love and the things we have in life are not limited in any possible way by our circumstances.

Each person is born with the same possibilities as every other person and those possibilities are unlimited. Understand however the circumstances we are born into may be different, but the Unlimited Potential and Possibilities in our lives is the same.

Some people are born into circumstances which present a greater challenge to overcome, but the potential remains the same for everyone. God built into each of us the ability to create the life we desire and dream of. Along with Unlimited Possibilities is Unlimited Ability in our thought and mental growth.

For example, let's look at Thomas Edison. He did not just wave a wand and invent electricity. The ability to create electricity was in every person of that era, but Thomas Edison thought about what this new invention would be. He envisioned it, nurtured the vision and made a very concious decision to find the components to develop it. He drew upon his unlimited potential and did not give up on it. If you study Mr. Edison, you will learn how he tried hundreds of ideas before he succeeded.

The idea of electricity never changed during the process. His vision never changed, only his methods. He didn’t just accidentally fly a kite and find electricity. He knew exactly what he was looking for because he saw it in his mind, long before he made the discovery. He focused on the idea and gave it tremendous attention.

This same ability exists in each of us. Every invention, finding, discovery and piece of art begins with a thought. Humans are given the ability to think. It is then what you do with that ability that makes you different from those around you.

Some people choose to use their thought to create and others choose to use it to hold them back. Again, there is no distinction, other than the decision to use the thought either in a positive or a negative manner. Positive thinking, or as I call it, Creative Thinking (using your creative plane) is just as powerful as negative or destructive thinking.

Every one of us is exactly what we choose to be, based on our own thinking. I do not, however, agree with the old cliché of "You are what you think you are". Instead, I choose a newer version, "What you think - You Are".

So what does all of this have to do with potential? Your potential is only limited by your level of thinking. If you genuinely see yourself as a successful artist, creator, entrepreneur, parent or any other vision you may have, then that is exactly what you are and your life will reflect exactly who you know you are inside. But, on the other side, if you see yourself as a misfit, a nobody, unsuccessful, a failure or just not the person you want to be, then this is exactly what your life will reflect.

I wish I could say that potential is based entirely on what you think about, but there is another powerful consideration. And, that is belief. Covering up a lack of belief with positive thinking will only tend to cloud your results in life. You can not mask a deep rooted fear and negative thought process with a few positive thoughts. It takes consistent action to change your belief process.

You must implement a solid personal development program to accomplish this level of change in your belief system. You must learn to direct your thoughts into the right area and have total control over your thoughts to see this level of success. With consistent and daily attention to what your thinking, your words and how you respond to circumstances, you can start to see small steps of accomplishment.

Start today by filling your mind, your eyes and your ears with sound, uplifting and positive thoughts and images. Be very aware of what you put into your mind. If you watch trash, then your mind will focus on trash. If you associate with negative, draining people, then your results will be the same as their results.

Take a look at your 5 closest friends. If they are not the type of people you want to transform yourself into, then I strongly suggest finding new friends. You truly are the company you keep, simply because their influence determines what you put into your mind. Once you make some small changes in what you see, hear, speak and think, you will begin to see the unlimited potential in yourself and you will see immediate change in your circumstances.

What you think about and give energy to, comes about.

To your unstoppable success...

Just Dance - The Essence Within Which Drives Our Passions

Life is meant to be lived! Not just experienced, but to be lived with passion, enthusiasm, determination, and commitment. The human race was never intended to just get by, to struggle and fight non-stop battles. We were created in God's image for a reason, not by circumstance. Each of us has been given a passion, a desire of our heart which is the essence of who we were intended to be. We are expected to nurture this passion and create for ourselves the life intended for us to live.

This essence within us is our soul. It is the true self we hear so many people are looking for. It is where the passion to create an extraordinary life resides. It is where the motivation for "out of the box" thinking comes from. Our true essence is our true self. And, this true self is not hard to find. It takes a little soul searching, a little digging and yes, even a little fire and drive from within to find ourselves and learn who we were truly intended to be.

There are people, such as artists who find this essence early in life and are able to nurture it and sculpt from it an intensity for a greater creative plane of existence. Others, such as myself, must find the essence through the absolute determination to experience and live on a greater plane, to live a life of extreme passion, excitement and accomplishment.

This may sound difficult, it may seem the essence is something you have to search for to find, but I have great news for us all. The essence within us has a switch. A simple button which can be turned on at any given time. A switch which will open the door to greater thinking, greater creativity, greater fun, greater joy and a quality of life we have all dreamed about experiencing.

But, WE must turn the switch. WE must identify the location of the button and turn it on in order to experience the essence of life.

So where is the switch? It lies within our hearts. Everyone has something, an activity which gets us more excited than anything else and gives us the energy to experience life at a greater level. For some it may be physical activities, others may be mental or emotional activities, others may be family ativities, but we all have the switch. I will even step out on the limb here and tell you that for some of the greatest artists, writers and business men in history, this essence was sexual activities.

One of my personal motivators is Dancing. Dancing brings out a person within without inhibitions and fear. A person who can do and accomplish anything. A person of passion, power and a zest for life. When I dance, when I release the essence within me, I find a person who loves life and with a thirst to experience everything life has to offer. With dancing, the creative juices flow. Things fall into place that once were confusing and out of sorts. Life has a greater ease. I exist on a higher plane than before.The essence of me was hidden behind my love of dance. Dancing releases my true self into the world.

But dancing is not the motivator for everyone. Each of us must find our own essence and it is our responsibility to find that essence and release it. Just take a little time to find the "thing" in life which has been set aside for a very long time. The thing you always wanted to do. Chances are good you will find your essence and once you do.... RELEASE IT. Indulge in it and allow yourself to find the ectasy of true self.

Your life will change dramatically and believe it or not, you Deserve to have the change you desire.

To your unstoppable success...

The Best Christmas Wish Ever!

I received a moving Christmas card today and wanted to share it's message with you.

Scatter Joy... Inspire Hope... Share Love... Seek Peace

Scatter Joy: If we have Joy in our hearts, then we can easily scatter it to the people we encounter every day. Joy comes from within, from the heart and will seep through our inner self and show itself in everything we do. Joy exists in us all, but sometimes we have to remind ourselves by looking at the people we love and the many things we are grateful for. Let's find the Joy already living in our hearts and Scatter it around for others to enjoy.

Inspire Hope: Through our own outlook for life and living do we Inspire Others to have their own Hope? In a time when so many people are finding life more and more difficult, we have more opportunity than ever before to inspire others to have Hope for their future, their families and even for their purpose. We should all recieve this as a challenge and step up to inspire others to have hope.

Share Love: We all have Love in our hearts. Let's tap into the love, let it multiply and grow so we can share it with everyone we meet. Love is an energy and will spread like wildfire simply by feeding it and allowing it to be seen by others.

Seek Peace: Peace of Heart, Peace of Mind and Peace of Self. It is all ours for the taking. We should Seek the peace within us and when we do, our lives will change exponentially. Peace of Heart, Mind and Self will open us for greater creativity, clarity of purpose and profound results in our lives. Peace replaces the stress and allows us to experience life at an entirely different and greater level.

This is a simple message, but one of great power, authority and empowerment. I hope in some small way, this message will empower you as it has me.

Merry Christmas to you all...

Are You Communicating in Business and Relationships?

If you were to ask me about the number one component missing in our society today both in business and in relationships, I would have say it is "communication". Communication is quickly becoming a lost art, obsolete and rarely something anyone is willing or capable of engaging in.

In business, I find those who understand the art of communication are the high performers, the people with the most sales or with the highest performing team. The great communicators possesss a position in their industry, a place of honor and recognition admired by others.

And what about relationships, from the intimacy of a couple to the raising of children and the ability to talk to anyone in any situation, communication would change this world and our experiences in relationships.

With our world of text messages, email and instant messages, we have lost what counts most. We are living in a world of Cliche's. Conversation has become more of "What's Up", "How you doing?" and my favorite.... "Whatever!". Our children do not know how to communicate to each other or to us and our Relationships suffer from the lack of real communication.

And here is a Newsflash for you... Talking is Not Communicating. Small talk is an art as well, but where some people use it none at all, others abuse it. Some people just jump right to the big issues, opinions and miss an opportunity to enjoy the intimacy of communication.

Intimacy is important in all relationships. Learning more about the people you encounter and sharing your deepest feelings and thoughts with the person you love most in your life. It is all intimacy and true intimacy can only spring from good communication.

Are you engaging the people you meet? Are you looking them in the eye when they speak to you, are you taking the opportunity to know who they are and what they think and feel? Are you shaking their hands with strength and confidence?

And ladies, let me tell you something very important, a handshake is NOT A "MAN THING". A hand shake should be an opportunity to share a bit of yourself with the person you meet. It is an opportunity for them to become curious about you, who you are and what you have to share with them. Communication begins with simple encounters such as handshakes. Do it with power and conviction.

Personally, when I meet someone, I extend my hand with authority and confidence. If they return (men or women), with a weak, partial hand or a namby pamby wrist shake, I have to work very hard to find substance in them. They have missed an opportunity to make a good first impression with me. Communication begins with the first moment of contact.

I challenge you to take a look at your skills in the area of communication. Evaluate for yourself why you may not be communicating with the people in your life. Lack of confidence, fear of saying the wrong thing or standing out in a crowd could be the culprit. Put yourself out there, you just might find it really does not hurt at all but on the other hand, will greatly improve your business, your personal life and your own self confidence.

Once you make an improvement in your communication skills, your life will change dramatically! You will be leaving the people in your life with a small piece of youself every day.

To your unstoppable success...

Self-Revelation - Finding Your Passion

Life is Self-Revelation, it's all about revealing ourselves. Every day, we reveal who we are to everyone we encounter, and to the World. Everything we do, everything we say and even the things we think about and give energy and attention to are about who we are.

In reality, much of what we are revealing to the world though has little to do with our true self. The real person our inner self desires to be, the hidden person inside.

Too often, we go through our lives as robots. As pre-created beings who have little or no control over who we are, our circumstances or even our destiny. It is the person created by others. Our thoughts, our beliefs (even our belief in ourselves) are hand-me-downs from the relationships in our lives. From the feelings of our loving families and their desires for us, to the tirades of out of control people, even the fears others have imposed on us based on their own fears. From people we have known and the people of brief encounters. Our life we are living is seldom our own.

Self-revelation should be something personal, a focus on revealing to ourselves our deepest desires. It is about finding the person hidden within and the Revelation of real purpose and destiny. But how do we find out who we truly are, who we were intended to be? The answer is so simple, once we open our eyes to find the lost person within, instead of the person who has lived a life of compromise and struggle and eventually given into the dreams of others.

I would like to challenge each of you to take a deep inner look at who you are hiding within. For once, look at everything you encounter with new eyes with a new zest to grasp yourself and create your own destiny. But not in selfishness, however in creating a better version of you. A version who lives with passion, intrique and intimacy in every area of your life.

Take a very deep look within your heart, looking at your beliefs and the way you think, at your passions and your relationships. Take a look at your motivations and the stimuli in your life, what are they? Are you living through your own passions and are the stimuli leading you to your true destiny?

Remember, life is not a destination, it is a journey. Are you living your own journey, or that of others? Have you placed your life on hold while building the life others desire for you? Become intimate with your own beliefs, your own goals and desires. Once you have done this, you just may find the real self was not so deeply hidden, only temporarily placed on hold.

Life is too short to not live in passion. Once you find that passion, you will find yourself and the person you reveal every day to the World, will make a difference in the World.

To your unstoppable success....

Random Acts of Kindness - The Cab Ride

I wish I could give credit for this beautiful story. If any of my readers know the author, please share with me. Enjoy...

I arrived at the address and honked the horn. After waiting a few minutes, I walked to the door and knocked... 'Just a minute', answered a frail, elderly voice.

I could hear something being dragged across the floor. After a long pause, the door opened. A small woman in her 90's stood before me. She was wearing a print dress and a pillbox hat with a veil pinned on it, like somebody out of a 1940's movie. By her side was a small nylon suitcase.

The apartment looked as if no one had lived in it for years. All the furniture was covered with sheets. There were no clocks on the walls, no knickknacks or utensils on the counters. In the corner was a cardboard box filled with photos and glassware. 'Would you carry my bag out to the car?' she said.

I took the suitcase to the cab, then returned to assist the woman. She took my arm and we walked slowly toward the curb. She kept thanking me for my kindness. 'It's nothing', I told her.. 'I just try to treat my passengers the way I would want my mother treated'. 'Oh, you're such a good boy', she said.

When we got in the cab, she gave me an address and then asked, 'Could you drive through downtown?' 'It's not the shortest way,' I answered quickly.. 'Oh, I don't mind,' she said. 'I'm in no hurry. I'm on my way to a hospice'.

I looked in the rear-view mirror. Her eyes were glistening. 'I don't have any family left,' she continued in a soft voice.. 'The doctor says I don't have very long. ' I quietly reached over and shut off the meter. 'What route would you like me to take?' I asked.

For the next two hours, we drove through the city. She showed me the building where she had once worked as an elevator operator. We drove through the neighborhood where she and her husband had lived when they were newlyweds. She had me pull up in front of a furniture warehouse that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing as a girl.

Sometimes she'd ask me to slow in front of a particular building or corner and would sit staring into the darkness, saying nothing. As the first hint of sun was creasing the horizon, she suddenly said, 'I'm tired. Let's go now'.

We drove in silence to the address she had given me. It was a low building, like a small convalescent home, with a driveway that passed under a portico. Two orderlies came out to the cab as soon as we pulled up. They were solicitous and intent, watching her every move. They must have been expecting her. I opened the trunk and took the small suitcase to the door.

The woman was already seated in a wheelchair. 'How much do I owe you?' she asked, reaching into her purse. 'Nothing,' I said 'You have to make a living,' she answered. 'There are other passengers,' I responded. Almost without thinking, I bent and gave her a hug. She held onto me tightly. 'You gave an old woman a little moment of joy,' she said. 'Thank you.' I squeezed her hand, and then walked into the dim morning light.. Behind me, a door shut.

It was the sound of the closing of a life.. I didn't pick up any more passengers that shift. I drove aimlessly lost in thought. For the rest of that day, I could hardly talk. What if that woman had gotten an angry driver, or one who was impatient to end his shift? What if I had refused to take the run, or had honked once, then driven away?

On a quick review, I don't think that I have done anything more important in my life. We're conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments. But great moments often catch us unaware - beautifully wrapped in what others may consider a small one.

PEOPLE MAY NOT REMEMBER EXACTLY WHAT YOU DID, OR WHAT YOU SAID ~BUT~THEY WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER HOW YOU MADE THEM FEEL.

You won't get any big surprise by sharing this story with others, but, you might help make the world a little kinder and more compassionate by doing so. Reminding others that often it is the random acts of kindness that most benefit all of us.

Merry Christmas...

When Inspiration Strikes...

As Entrepreneurs, Writers, Artists, Executives or Mom's and Dad's, we count on having a daily dose of inspiration and motivation to help us to accomplish our goals and effect the lives of others.

We don't talk enough about inspiration, so often we just do whatever we do and know that something inside is driving us. But that something must be inspiration. Sometimes we can determine where the inspiration comes from and other times, we can't. It is not necessary to always know where the inspiration derives, but in order to use it at our will, we must be able to label it and draw from it.

In order to move from mediocrity to greatness, call it genius if you like, or even the "creative plane" it takes a dose of inspiration to help us to move to that level. Without identifying what inspires us, we can easily become stagnant in our creative world.

In history, there have been many great people who have accomplished phenomenal feats in art, music, business or family, simply from identifying the source of their inspiration. Sometimes, that inspiration comes from the form of a Muse type being, a person who has the ability to reach inside of someone and pull out the genius that exists.

Other times, the inspiration may come form a chance meeting or a simple conversation with someone you may not even know, but a person who has that special quality of finding the best inside you.

For me, anytime I write, I can only do so when I feel inspiration from within. But that inspiration is always the result of something I have received from someone else. Either a word of wisdom, or a story that touched my heart or a success beyond reason.

Recently a person I have yet to even meet, and just talked to briefly has inspired me to turn out a couple chapters of my book in a very quick time frame. But how can someone I don't know, inspire me to this level.

I believe the answer is a simple one...

Inspiration is an energy, as all things on this earth are. The energy one may feel from a special person, or an attitude of greatness, or even the hope portrayed by another, it is still energy. Energy is a vibration and some people just vibrate at a higher level than others and tend to pass on that energy to those they encounter.

I do not want to go too deep, as there will be a great deal on this subject in my book, however, I do want to leave you with this thought.

Look for the people in your life who have a special inner energy. Who in just their presence, make you feel more alive, more focused and more inspired. When you identify someone who passes this level of energy to you, even though it may be for just a moment, make an effort to spend more time with them. They may have a huge dose of inspiration just waiting to be passed on, or they may be in your life for an even greater purpose. They just may be the person you have been waiting for to give you something special, which either way, can be the inspiration you need to accomplish greatness.

To your unstoppable success...

Oh! But to Just Live My Life Myself...

Funny how sometimes, people we know, people we love, even people we admire, are much too involved in how we are living our lives. I constantly battle with the intrinsic nature of the people who know best how I should live my life without even a whisper from me as to how they should live theirs.

Life is for living, and it is the responsibility of every individual to determine the lifestyle which is best suited to their own nature. But there will always be the forever meddler who wants to tell us what is best.

Don't misunderstand me here, I truly appreciate the people who care for me and are very concerned that I might actually leap out of an airplane without a parachute or something really stupid! Believe me, I know what would happen without a parachute, and assure you, I will never jump without one! Just because my choices do not necessarily mirror their own, then does that make mine wrong, NO...

Let's face it. We are all adults, and as adults, we make decisions, take actions and experience the results of our actions. This is how life works. Of course there will always be those who fail to make decisions, take action and subsequently never experience the bountiful, abundant and exhilerating life available to us all. But that is their choice, definitely not mine!

I choose to live my life as an adult, as guided by a higher power and with the abilities given me, make the decisions myself for my own actions. Therefore, I assume responsibility for my actions and my results. Because I am willing to live my life at this level, I will never whine and complain about what comes my way.

Yes, things do happen that we wish did not, such as the death of my wonderful husband, but I have chosen to honor my promise to him and live my life to the best of my desire and my ability. I celebrate that I am able to do this.

Why am I ranting, you ask? Just venting... I want my readers and my followers to know that I do assume responsibility for myself. And regardless of the advise given, I accept with gratitude the advice, but the final actions I take in every situation will be those I deem the right fit for me! And maybe, just maybe I will serve someone as an example or even bring a new realm of possibilities to the awareness of someone who just happens to be in the right place at the right time.

Just passing along my thoughts.

To your unstoppable success...

"Just a Thought"

"Life is truly a journey, but it is the engine behind the journey that gets you there." Wanda Grindstaff

What energy runs your engine? Living life at it's utmost potentiality is the greatest energy of all and can run your engine at great speeds. Are you living your own greatest potentiality?

Thought for Today...

"The greatest accomplishment is in choosing who to be and becoming the person of your choice."
Wanda Grindstaff

It is never necessary to take life as it comes, or to be the person your circumstances create. Create your life, yourself, your reality!

Thought for Today...

"Transformation is only possible when it is an Inside Job"
Wanda Grindstaff

My own personal transformation is only because of the decision to remove all other options from my path. When you take the "Trying" out of a decision, it becomes personal, a goal, a commitment, a real option. And only then, will it become a reality.

To your unstoppable success...

Recreating Yourself to Be "YOU"

So often, we become a person we do not recognize. Regardless of the reasons, we can easily slip into a version of ourself that is anything but familiar.

As you move from one era of your life to the next, it is very important to determine who you are in the new era. Take time to identify your passions, your true beliefs (not what others want you to believe), how you want others to see you, your inner thoughts , your source of energy and your personal goals. These are a reflection of who you are.

From my personal experience, having been in a wonderful marriage and then suddenly losing my husband, I was thrown into the unknown. Even though my husband is still a vital part of my life, I am no longer that person and no longer part of a couple. The person I was in marriage is not the same person I am today. Not that either person is better than the other, just different in many ways.

Right before my husband died, he passed on very powerful wisdom. He said "spread your wings and be the person you put on hold while being my wife"? At first, I thought I had not put anything on hold, his wife, is what I wanted to be. But in time, I have realized there were many passions that were no longer part of my life during marriage because I replaced them with "us" passions.

Now I am getting back to who I am as an individual. I am again strong, athletic, a dancer, a daredevil who loves to try new things and new adventures. I have even recently tried skydiving. Funny how that one popped in. My husband always laughed that desire right off, one of the few things he would never support me in. But it is something I have always wanted to do, so why not now?

The point is... It is not necessary to always be the same person. It is okay to decide who you are and then create that person from within. It brings you new hope, new energy and new drive. It puts a freshness into every day and provides an opportunity for you to create the person you truly are inside and it gives you a strong foundation for letting go of the past.

Regardless of the situation you are in, whatever loss or whatever struggle. Find your true self. Honor yourself with integrity and zeal for life. You deserve to be the person you truly are and live your life with purpose and absolute intention.

To your unstoppable success...

When Pain Holds You Back

Many coaches and mentors talk frequently about limiting beliefs and how so often, the inaccuracies passed on through experiences and from others, create a false belief of what is possible. These limiting beliefs will stop us dead in our tracks and can keep us from accomplishing the greatness we were destined to live.

But how often do we hear of the pain in our lives keeping us from living our true destiny?

I can not even begin to understand the level of pain others experience. I only know my own, but through my own, I can possibly offer a bit of comfort to others.

Be it military personnel who are injured in duty who suffer a physical pain not understood by outsiders. Or, the loss of close friends and brothers, again a pain outsiders will not understand. Pain can be physical or emotional, but it is still pain and pain is a nasty foe who will go to any length to keep you where you are and not allow you to move beyond.

Pain from divorce or the death of a loved one, can be crippling. Too often, we take pain as something we choose to never experience again. We refuse to open our hearts to others or to allow others inside to help heal us.

I believe with every thread of my being that people are brought to us for a reason and for a season. Sometimes the season seems too short, but it is not for us to understand the timeline. Everyone is in our lives for a reason and then they move on. We must let go of the pain and find the reason they were there. Once that is realized, the pain can truly start to fade.

Pain of any level is like a brick wall. You must climb over it, it just won't dissappear, it takes a concentrated effort to defeat it. But in every case, I believe there is someone in our lives to help us to defeat it.

We were not placed on this earth to live in pain. We were meant to live in peace and joy and regardless of the pain suffered, there truly is peace and joy on the other side.

Let others lift you out of your pain. You will never forget the loved one you lost or the person you were married to, you will only let go of the pain which will allow you to experience the next level of your destiny.

You will be stuck in the pain place as long as you allow it to be. You must make the decision to let go and move forward. This takes putting memories where they belong and letting go of what is holding you back.

Just as the loved one you lost, someone else will come into your path to take you to the next level. A very dear friend of mine unknowingly lifted me out of my pain and suffering and my future instantly changed for it. Unfortunately, I am unable to lift him out of his pain at this time, but because he is a dear friend, I see nothing but potential and will always work toward helping him to find his peace and joy.

I don't mean to ramble here, but I do want you to know there is peace and joy out there for you. But until the pain is in it's proper place, you will only experience pain.

To your unstoppable success...

My BlogTalk Radio Show is Coming Back!

Just a heads up! My BlogTalk Radio show will return within the next 7 days. I will post the details as soon as they are finalized. Looking forward to having you join me.

She's B.A.C.K!!!!

Yes, I AM BACK! During the past year, with my husband's illness, death and my healing... I have posted very little to my blogs and written very little to speak of. The writing I have done has been from a place of pain, and from the foundation of the healing process.

But I am here today to let my loyal readers and followers know that I am BACK! There is still some healing to do and still a few issues I am dealing with, but the energy, the passion and the zeal for life is back and stronger than ever before!

I want to dedicate the future of this blog to this process. The abundance we experience in our lives establishes itself at many levels, and my goal is to address every level possible.

I am totally committed to assisting as many people as possible in moving to a level of Extreme Abundance. This process is twofold however. On one hand, helping you in whatever small way I can and on the other, moving myself to a greater level of excellence.

Thank you to the thousands who have hung with me during this past year, your love, your loyalty and your undying support can not go unrecognized. I am here to serve you and serve you, I WILL!

To your own unstoppable success...

Teetering on the Tightrope of Excellence

Funny how the greatest accomplishments and insight sometimes come from very small, very obscure happenings around us. Personal burdens can frequently plague us, pull us down or hold us back. However, they can be quickly eliminated when we are open to allow them to and open to receiving the inspiration for change.

Moving beyond our personal best, to a higher level, requires a deeper and greater inspiration than ever before experienced. Those inspirations can be very small things, or sometimes, from the people around us who, by their own example, live their lives, unknowingly at a level of excellence few people ever truly experience.

Sadly, the core of human nature is to become a victim of the life we are handed. It would be very easy for me to drift into victimhood. After all, I did lose my husband and the world around me would prefer that I function as the "poor widow", which I am totally unwilling to accept. I could never honor the excellence my late husband portrayed by allowing his death to push me into mediocrity rather than moving me forward toward personal excellence.

I see the world we live in as a tightrope. Often when we are walking on this tightrope, we literally are teetering between mediocrity and excellence with no medium ground between. Amazingly, the excellence frequently just takes a little inspiration, a little action and of course a little determination.

The inspiration to move to the right side of this tightrope is probably in front of you. Maybe through a book you've been planning to read, a person you know, or even a new casual acquaintance, inspiring you through their own zeal and energy for life.

Moving to the right side of the tightrope takes very little action. It does require belief, faith and commitment. But, the first thing it takes is the decision.

I truly believe if I can pull myself to the right side of the line, anyone can. Anyone can live in excellence if they are just willing to take a step in that direction and make a decision to give up the life of mediocrity.

This is a very fine line and a small step reaps huge results in our lives.

Isn't it time to move to the right side of the tightrope and live the life you truly deserve?

To your unstoppable success...

The Path of Healing

We are all on our own path. Some, move quickly through the journey, never looking back and others contemplate every step very carefully. For every person, the method, the path, the journey is different.

We are not born with instruction books and even though we are given the ability to learn and absorb knowledge from many levels, we do not KNOW what we need to know until the time is right for us to absorb and understand.

When my husband died almost 6 months ago, I contemplated a great many paths to take. Being the headstrong, powerful woman I have always viewed myself to be, I made a very quick decision that ultimately took me to a crushing downfall. I decided to "Be Strong" as I thought Jerry would want me to be and to set a new standard for strength in adversity.

I quickly jumped back into my business, even started a new venture and buried myself in "my work". But I did not take time to heal. Then suddenly reality paid me a visit. For some time, I was pretty much unable to function. I could not call prospects, I could not follow up with friends, I could not face people and live my life day to day. I fell into an emotional pit!

Through the Grace of God and with the messages delivered through some powerful mentors in my life, I was able to recieve some powerful guidance and inspriation. I now live in a place of absolute gratitude for everything and everyone in my path. I am now coming out of the pit.

And, fortunately, I am a much better person than when I entered.

Now, I am more focused and devoted to what I see as my role in this world. The world truly is all about what you give, how you give and how many people you help. My focus now is all about helping and I am on a journey to help as many people as I can.

Am I totally healed of my pain? Absolutely not! I may never be. But I am on the pathway to healing and each day gets better and easier. I am sure I will have frequent challenging days, but I can face those days now with my head high and my spirit in tact!

I am recommiting myself to you, my readers, to my business associates and my friends and family as I know now I am in a better place to assist you in whatever small way I can.

Our journeys are always for a reason and it is not our job to know what that reason might be. It is only our job to walk in trust and in faith. To trust God to provide the path he wants us to journey and to know that He is in control.

God has put into my heart and my spirit the burning desire to help assist people to find their rightful path and journey and that is exactly the path I will honor. Will I be perfect? No, I am certain I will not. But, I will be devoted and determined to fulfill this path, this journey and to take as many people along with me that I can possibly imagine.

It IS going to be an extraordinary ride and I look forward to having you all come along with me. You may lead, you may follow or just walk beside me but it will be fun, productive and inspiring to all, that is my prayer.

I just wanted to share these thoughts with you and look forward to hearing from you.

To your unstoppable success!

Lessons Learned from Baby Sea Turtles - It's All About the Goal

Several years ago, when my husband and I decided to move to Emerald Isle, NC to experience "Ocean Front" living, we knew there would be adventures ahead of us. Of course, we were thinking more in the form of hurricanes and swarms of beachgoers. We also knew we would have a whole new perspective on nature.

The constant changing of the beach is certainly something we expected with the wind and surf. We knew the abundance of wildlife in the form of birds, porpoises, sharks and even an occasional whale would be a moving experience for us. But it never occurred to either of us we would learn so much and be so involved in the lives of Sea Turtles.

These beautiful, graceful, majestic and meek creatures find their way to our little island in the Southern Outer banks to lay their nests each summer. In the still of the night, they come on shore and find the perfect spot to entrust with their eggs. Unfortunately, with the ever increasing numbers of tourists and the debris they leave on the beach (umbrellas, chairs, awnings and even kayaks) and the enormous holes dug in the sand, the likelihood of the mother laying her eggs or the hatchlings surviving the process have decreased dramatically.

When we first moved here, I became involved by volunteering with the Sea Turtle Protection program. I would walk the beach in the very early hours to find the tracks of turtles and report any nests I might find. I and the other volunteers would then step in and protect the nest until hatching time. Once hatching time came about, we then do all we can to help the little guys get to the water.

This year, with the passing of my husband, I decided to ramp up my participation and coordinate the volunteers for the stretch of beach where I live. This increased involvement has brought me to an entirely different level of appreciation for these creatures.

Earlier this week when a nest in my area hatched, I was overwhelmed by the determination of these 84 little babies who emerged from the nest with determination and focus. They knew only their goal and immediately took on the challenge.

The tiny turtles, who have only a 1 in 1000 chance to make it to adulthood start their lives with a "never give up" attitude. They are not stopped by fear of the challenges they face. They do not question their decisions or change their minds. They trudge forward and onward without hesitation.

Their journey from the nest to the water can be very long one. They encounter the danger of birds and crabs who see them as a delicacy. They endure the possibility of being stepped on by humans, being baked by the sun or even being distracted by the light of homes which pull them in the wrong direction. But they carry on, totally determined. Once in the water, the danger they face is unimaginable to humans, but it does not stop them.

Focused only on their goal, they know their destination and even though they are just over an inch in size, they are determined to get there. They sometimes get sidetracked by obstacles, but we nudge them in the right direction and they continue on.

So, what was the lesson? When I coach people on the unlimited possibilities in their lives, I am always surprised at the limited beliefs, holding people back from their destiny. Unlike humans who stop, balk and even run from every challenge, every detour and every fear, the little tiny turtles never stop, they just keep going.

Humans are so often totally controlled by the environment and the people around them. We limit ourselves with every turn and every decision, never giving our true destiny a chance.
There is so much we could learn from these tiny little creatures. They start their journey with determination and never consider the possibility of failure.

Instead, we often start journeys focused only on the challenge and with the mindset of failure and an expectation of limitation and problems. We too should live our lives with huge goals, determination and focus.

Challenges frequently go away when determination takes their place. Life is full of bumps in the road, but like the turtles, we should stay focused and live the lives we dream of, not to be distracted at every turn. We should set huge goals and stay focused on the attainment of the goal.

Take time today to ask yourself this question, "If I started every day, knowing my goal and focused on living the life I truly desire, with determination and drive, what would my life really be like? What could we really accomplish?

I know of no limits! The possibilities are endless.

To your unstoppable success...